The True Gift of The Season: The Way You Make Them FEEL!

Arising at my normal pre-dawn hour, I crept into the kitchen to make my usual cup of hot chocolate.

There was the stack.

The stack!




All I could do was break down in uncontrollable giggles.

Givers UNITE!

This is your time and your season!

Without a doubt, you have a right to celebrate. This is your time... to give... in abundance without shame!

After I'd stopped giggling, I sifted through the stack of sales papers that were piled high by someone in my household, getting ready for "the kill."




As I took the stack back to bed to continue to rifle through them, I laughed out loud at some of the items I saw on display at a popular international market:

-3-piece ceramic elephant tea set, displayed in red, but "also available in blue."
-Santa pants filled with Yogurt-covered pretzels
-Alaina bird cage picture holder
-Magnetic dartboard



On and on in the flyer was the display of gaudy jewelry and other unique gifts for under $20.

Why do we do what we do at Christmas time?

Why do we suspend reality and buy things that no one needs, much less wants, during this season of giving.

We want to give people...something...
We want to let them know that we care.
We want to let them know that they are special to us, not only at Christmas but all through the year.


That's truly the reason for giving gifts at Christmas time.
We need to let people know they matter.

So, regardless of how ugly or gaudy the gift in the package, I always feel blessed...in the moment.


That's all that truly matters.

How do you feel in the moment?

Just as much as it's the Season of Giving, it also can be the Season of Discontent.


In some households this Christmas, there will be items thrown against walls...some hurled back in people's faces...glass items deliberately thrown on the floor and broken...items left untouched, as if diseased, once the packages are opened.


These are all responses from disappointed folks about what they got from their spouses, partners and loved ones.

Disappointed folks aside, can we put some reason into the holiday season?

Can we suspend our judgment about the items we receive and simply stay in the moment of joy, absorbing the fact...the fact...that someone thought of us as they were racing through the busyness of their day. Imagine this...

A full day of shopping, then remembering the one person we'd forgotten to include in the gift buying.

Turning back, as tired as he/she might be, to pick up an item...yes, agreeably an ugly item...so you won't be left out in the cold.


Imagine that weary soul.

Say "thank you," for that moment of remembering.

Years ago, I used to be challenged at Christmas time just as many people are today. But I eventually discovered a unique way to celebrate the holidays... almost every day of the year.

Yes. I am a "giver addict," as are most of the people with whom I share my life.


Yes. We're addicted to giving.

We don't try. That's simply who we are on autopilot.

So, in any given day, I walk into surprises and generosity of spirit all around me.

The thing is this spirit, like all energy, moves in a circular motion.


So, what do I do? When I walk into a surprise or a taste of love, I simply continue the circle of giving, letting it flow on to others.

I've discovered that it doesn't matter if it's an item you give, or a word of truth. People respond to that. The gift is in caring enough to share a kindness or thoughtful comment.



Each week I interact with scores of people whom I know "for sure" don't care as much about what I'm telling them, as much as how I make them feel!

Yes, of course they pay attention to what I'm saying. But at the end of the day...at the end of the conversation...the thing that remains with that man or woman, albeit a stranger, long after I've shared the information is the way I've made them FEEL!

I've been witness to a compliment turning a sour person into the gentlest of souls.

I've seen a "I truly understand and respect your position" turn an argumentative spirit into an ally.

How do you make them FEEL?That is the ultimate question.




Do you validate their position? Do you validate them as a person? Do you let them know that they matter, despite having a difference of opinions?

How do you make them feel?

Before the holiday season begins, I spend time thinking of the people in my path who I want to "gift" for the holidays. I think about the imprint they have left on my Soul, and what it is I want to communicate back to them with the gift I give.

How do they make me feel?
How do I want to make them to feel?


I'd like to think that everyone who crosses my path in any given day is special to me and the universe: this is the "namaste'" attitude I support and endorse.

As we all know, the reality is different.

No matter how much we try, there are some folks who will always make us feel
less than whole.

Quickly dismiss them.

Focus on the ones who leave an impression of "goodness" ...of love...of generosity of spirit...of joy.

Think about that spirit inside that personality as you select a Christmas gift for him/her.

What is it you think he/she most needs communicated from you?

Ultimately, that's how you should decide what to give.

It shouldn't be the cost of the item (s).


It simply should and ought to be: How do you want to make them FEEL?

How do YOU want to make them FEEL?

Can you get a handle on that this Christmas?

Yep. Just ignore the stack of sales papers with the magnetic dartboards and "women's and men's gift-boxed jelly watches."

Get into each of their souls.

If you do so, each and every time, you'll be led to give the perfect gift.

Trust me on this.

What is it that you want to make them FEEL?


Namaste',

Che'

I Met Up with Happiness At a CHEVRON Gas Station!

It was a spiritual exercise someone had challenged a
group of us to do: expect happiness, within a week
of deciding that we were looking for it.

We were told that we were "guaranteed" to get happiness,
once we're focused on finding it.

So, all week, my expectations were HIGH.

Would my happiness come in the form of a lottery ticket?



For a millisecond, I was tempted to go to the corner store
to purchase a Lotto ticket to ensure happiness showed up
in the form of a windfall of millions of dollars to use at my
disposal.




Then, I began to wonder if that's what would truly make me happy...
winning millions of dollars and being set for life.

hmmm.


As thoughts of idling my life away at some beachfront
home on some idyllic island flooded my mind, right
in the middle of the thought... I began to get bored.

I really, truly got bored thinking about winning those millions and having
nothing to do but waste away each moment of every day.


Even when I thought of putting the millions of dollars
to good use by helping other people find their way in
life... I got bored at the thought.

People truly don't need me to help them find their way.

So the thought of taking millions from "over here" and placing them "over there" to get some program going to help people...bored me. Truly, the thought honestly bored me.

Some people are cut out for "service work," and I bless them because I'm not.

Um. um...um...

What would make me happy?

Honestly.

What would make me happy?


I mean I was thinking of a state of beingness that would
take me out of my current world.

I wanted to want this "happiness" so badly. I wanted it to be something that I was "missing" in my life!

I longed to embrace this "elusive" happiness
that so many people seem so busy searching for
throughout their lives.


I began to look back at different periods of
my life and thought over "the things" I thought would make me happy.

Over the course of the week, I kept thinking, then discarding
in short fashion, all the things that I thought would bring happiness.

One by one, I discarded them.



No. That wouldn't work for me today.

No. This other thing that I so badly wanted also wouldn't work
for me today.

So, unable to come up with a single thing I thought would add to my current state of well being, I finally gave up.

It was just one day before the promised "deadline" to find this happiness.

I figured if the prediction were true, the Universe would have to find a way to truly surprise me.

I went along my business.

Then, just like that...happiness appeared...right in front of me.


I'd just started pumping gas into my tank, when I looked up
and saw a breathtaking form of happiness.

The image I saw was a young woman about the age of 23 years old who
was skipping and smiling broadly as she went back to her car from
the shop at the Chevron gas station.


It was the Saturday right after Thanksgiving, so I thought maybe, she was still joyous about something that occurred on Thanksgiving Day.

But no, there seemed to be something much deeper about the mirage
I saw. There was true bliss...true peace...true joy.

Never one to be shy, I asked her outright: "Why are you so joyous? What is making you so "happy?"

She said, "I feel so good because everywhere I go I am just seeing how beautiful people are and how happy every body is everywhere..."

I asked, "Really, do you see that?"
She said, "YES! YES!"


I gasped, as this little 23 year old wise woman bent into me as I continued to pump the gas and said, "I have something to share with you....because someone shared it with me many years ago, and it's been working for me ever since."

She asked,"Do you want to know what it is?"

By then...I could barely wait to hear her "secret."
She continued, "that person shared with me a smile so many years ago...and it changed everything for me in that moment."


I looked in amazement at this wise-woman/girl-child, as she continued, "A simple smile changed my life and my way of looking at life, and I've been trying to pass it on ever since."

I could not believe that this conversation was taking place...
I could not believe the uncanny timing of me having this particular
conversation with this little woman less than 24 hours before "happiness" was supposed to show up.

I stared back in amazement at her and in an enthusiastic fashion told
her how fascinated I was at this philosophy of life that she carried
with her where ever she went.

She said, "Yes. And because I want you to carry it with you, too..."

She then gently unfolded her hands and stepped closer to me,"I want you to have this happiness penny."

A penny.


A penny.

She was sharing with me a penny that she might have just found on the ground, as
it looked as if several cars had run over it.

I gasped and thanked her profusely for the penny.

How did she know?
How could she know?

Everywhere I go, I do get joyous and..happy...every single time I
find a penny.


I get happy...yes...happy...to get a penny.

Now, this stranger was sharing her happiness with me and passing it on
to me in the form of a penny, a symbol both she and I seem to appreciate
for its simply.

I grasped the penny as if indeed it were a multi-million dollar package someone had just hand delivered to me.

I saw the young woman, whose name is Victoria, hop and skip her way to her car, as she waited for her friend, who was still in the shop at the station.

I couldn't let this special "happy" moment pass, without some sort of recording.

I grabbed my iPhone, raced out of my car and asked her permission to take her picture.

I tried to get one of "happiness" by herself, but her best friend, Nicole, who had joined her, also wanted in. I asked Victoria, whether Nicole was just as happy a person as she was. They both immediately responded with a resounding "Yes...yes..yes..."I snapped their picture.

You see the evidence of these two happy young people.

Thing is...


All week I'd be expecting "happiness" to show up.

As you can see from the pictures, Victoria's and Nicole's faces...and the beauty that I saw...
the mirage of happiness I saw...whenI first saw Victoria, cannot be witnessed by you, my reader, second hand. So, you've just got to believe me that "happiness" looked like "unutterable JOY" on Victoria's...then Nicole's... face.



The memory of the happiness these young women reflected will stay with me. Their faces, though, always will remain "in shadow..."

Isn't that so much like the happiness people seek?


Isn't that so much like the elusive search we
conduct year after year after year...

Looking for that elusive "something."..."SOME thing..."
"some thing..." Ahhh...if only.

When I came home that night, I put away the penny Victoria
had given me in a special place with my other "special goods."

At least I know that even if I can never see the face of
"happiness" clearly again...I'll always have the "evidence" that it
does truly exist.

I went to bed...so grateful.


As I drifted off to sleep...my last thoughts were ...
on the fact that each day as I stay in the moment...
in the peace of the moment...in the flow of the
moment...

I am happy.

I always am happy in the moment.

‎"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures."
-Thornton Wilde

The only challenge remains to stay always and forever...
in that moment...

Where happiness always lives.

Just... stay in the moment...stay in the *F-L-O-W ...of what you seek.

Victoria and Nicole: Where ever you are at this moment, I know you're spreading your happiness. Thank you for sharing a moment in time with me and teaching me, in your youthful wisdom, the true meaning of happiness!


Namaste',

Che'
*NOTE: I strongly recommend reading "In the Flow of Life," by Eric Butterworth. This now-deceased "master" metaphysician authored hundreds of essays, articles and best-selling books that include, "Discover The Power Within You" and "Spiritual Economics." Butterworth also lead Sunday services at "Unity of New York," held at Avery Fisher Hall at Lincoln Center.