I loved the word, “gay,” and resented that its meaning was now being somewhat subverted to describe a group of people I did not then understand.
Then, when I bought a beautiful glass piece with a rainbow painted on it at a fair and soon after I displayed it found out it was a symbol used for “gayness," I said "S...!"
That pretty much summed up my feelings toward homosexuals for many years: ***"Damns...!"
I just didn’t understand the world of homosexuality...didn’t care to... and didn’t want to know!
But with my growing spirituality and constant striving to be “authentic” in all that I did in my interactions with people, I knew I needed to make it my business to UNDERSTAND!
"But why dost thou judge thy brother? or why dost thou set at nought thy brother?" Romans 14:10
I MUST have sent up a silent prayer.
One summer at Unity Village, the most beautiful man, the most impactful spiritual teacher I had that year turned out to be a gay man. I began to feel even more uncomfortable with my “damns...!” attitude.
You also can imagine how challenging this “damns...!” attitude was to someone who lived just outside San Francisco, the city known for its openness to the gay lifestyle and one that each year hosts the largest “Gay Parade” through its streets.
"DAMNS...!"
My Spirit was waiting for me another summer at Unity Village when I partnered with a woman in a class on "Discover the Power Within You." We were not assigned as partners; “Spirit” connected us from the first day of class when we said "hello" in not, one, but in two classes that week.
Being partners that week meant that we supported each other in our prayer requests and in our class work together. This blonde, blue-eyed woman was to be my alter ego for the week: “Okay, Spirit!”
My partner must have waited for the right time, on the right day, to share her prayer request with me: I don’t recall WHEN it happened. All I remember so clearly is hearing her words, seeing her tears, feeling her fear and her pain: She had gotten divorced not long before because she was finally being true to herself. She was now in love with a woman but did not know how to come “out” to the world.
She was excited about her bold step, but she was scared about the implications and the way of the future for her.
That week, I cried with my prayer partner. I asked God to guide us in our work together, and I especially asked him to ease her pain and fears.
As the week wore on and the impact of our studies on our Spiritual self became more practiced in both of us, we began to laugh more, relax and “know” that God was being God through both of us.
I was at Unity Village for two weeks that summer, as was my partner. We continued to support each other in prayer even in the second week when no class required it.
We did so because we’d become friends!
That summer at Unity Village changed my perspective on gayness and homosexuality. I thank God for it, and I give glory to the Spirit within me and also operating in the Universe!
No longer do I feel puzzled or troubled by gay people. I am at peace whenever I’m in the company of a gay person, man or woman.
I’ve learned this: The sexual preference of homosexuals is absolutely NONE of my business! The only thing people who are "straight" need to understand about any homosexual person is his or her heart! Once you look into the person's heart, you'll know the TRUTH!... you'll open your heart to love the person...anyway! That's what a loving Spirit...a loving God...wants us to do!
"You shall know the Truth and the Truth shall set you free!" John 8:32
My TRUTH tells me that it is my business to look into the Spirit of a person, gay, or not gay, and love them just as they are!
Beyond this, I’ve discovered a TRUTH that if we all pay attention we ALL can celebrate: Gay people are shining their Spirit and their light into the world, making it brighter, lighter and more loving than when they were forced to hide in the closet!
Just look around and see!
Gay people are now adopting kids, providing a home, security and a future that many kids would not have otherwise, and especially if relegated to the foster-care system.
This lesson was brought home to me a few weeks ago when I was at a friend’s home in San Francisco.
I was visiting with my friend and her sister who lived nearby.
The sister’s granddaughters stopped in, too, after a while to say hello to their aunt.
I hadn’t seen either girl since they were babies. Now, they were 13 and 17 years old, each with a different set of parents.
I knew the younger of the two girls, the 13 year old, was adopted at birth by the gay daughter of my friend’s sister and the daughter’s partner. The 17 year old was the daughter of my friend’s sister’s son.
(Wow! What a mouthful!)
I’m still in awe of the phenomenon that has occurred in both these teenagers’ lives, intersecting now at the home of the gay couple.
The younger girl introduced herself to me with such poise and grace that I was struck by that. As we continued to speak, I realized that this teenager was not your usual little adult coming of age. She was a young woman of Presence and fully in control of herself and her world.
I remarked about this and she said that it was the private school she attended that instilled strong values in the girls there. She also said it was her parents, i.e. her lesbian parents.
Well, I knew that.
I’ve truly been exposed to kids at different levels at different schools, private and public. I knew ONLY parents instilling certain values at home would truly make a difference, such a tremendously powerful difference!
About two weeks later, I was in conversation with one of the parents of this young girl. We spent a long time talking together, as I learned more and more about the lesbian couple’s philosophy towards life and their feeling of duty and obligations to the world.
Truly Solid! Truly Spiritual!
I would have left it there but then I asked why she kept referring to the “girls”, i.e. did they “adopt” a second child?
"Yes and No," the gay woman explained.
You see the second girl, the older of the two first cousins, had moved into their home, too, about a year or so ago.
I was curious about this, as the older teenager was very outgoing and seemed fun loving and carefree. She also was boy crazy!
"We didn't officially adopt her," my lesbian friend explained, "but she's our “child” too.
She had come to the lesbian couple a few years ago and asked them to be her “parents.” She knew she needed guidance and a family where “love” would show her the way to mature fully and properly into adulthood. They had taken her in.
I looked at my friend in awe.
As I walked away, I thought, "A 15 or 16 year old asking for guidance!?"
"Now THAT... is some COOL DAMNS...!!!”
Some REALLY c-o-ol "DAMNS..."of which rainbows are made!
Namaste’,
Che’
***NOTE: I used my original language to keep it all "real!" This also shows how far I've come in my understanding and acceptance of homosexuality.
2 comments:
This is real and honest; and I enjoyed reading it. My fears in what I was "taught" and conditioned by society to shun were quieted by a friendship with a gay couple who were my neighbors when I was pregnant so many years ago. We too are "coming out" in a sorts. We are coming out of those egoic prisons into Presence, no? Conformity with the world's views is surely a strengthening of ego.
You're obviously are correct. Conformity to the world view is a strengthening of the "ego" self. However, what does our "Spirit" tell us when we're in the presence of a gay person? That will be the TRUTH for all who care to be open enough to let gay people in and get to know them.
I appreciate your open and beautiful spirit, Ma Duke!
Che'
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